The Gambler

The Gambler

It’s a Saturday, and Lucy has a brunch date with Julien, whom she found on OKCupid. Julien, in case it wasn’t obvious from his name, is French. Lucy’s still on her mission to find a replacement for Charlie, and seems to be matching fairly regularly with foreigners. Not, perhaps, because… View Post
Lucy Goes… Speed Dating

Lucy Goes… Speed Dating

Lucy is fucking fed up. She’s now spent four cunting years swiping her way through the men of London, with absolutely zero success. Lucy has no bastard clue how some people can join dating apps, go on just one or two dates, and find a partner – but whatever their… View Post
The Date With A Dom

The Date With A Dom

In spite of her failed dates with Pablo the Venezuelan and Pierre the Frenchman, Lucy’s still convinced that a foreign guy is a much better prospect than all the hopeless British fuckwits who litter the dating apps like spat-out chewing gum. So, still keen to find a replacement for Charlie… View Post
The Frenchman

The Frenchman

Lucy’s date with Pablo the Argentinian might not have been a smoking hot success, but she’s never been one to give up at the first attempt. Convinced now that home-grown men are utterly fucking useless, and keen to capitalise on what she hopes is – to a foreigner at least… View Post
The Argentinian

The Argentinian

Now that things are over with Charlie, it’s time for Lucy to get back in the dating game. Well they do say the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else, right? And where better to find someone to get enthusiastically under than good ol’ Tinder?… View Post
Mr Non-Monogamous, Part 13 – Decision

Mr Non-Monogamous, Part 13 – Decision

For over a year Lucy’s been dating a non-monogamous man named Charlie. If you’ve missed all of this, you’ve got a shit tonne of catching up to do. Start from the beginning here, or just catch up on last week here. Lucy’s tried her hardest to accept the deal she’s… View Post
Mr Non-Monogamous, Part 12 – Decline

Mr Non-Monogamous, Part 12 – Decline

A year ago, Lucy went to a house party and met a devilishly sexy non-monogamous man named Charlie. Despite the fact that Charlie’s not only in an open relationship but also actually getting married to another woman, Lucy’s somehow ended up in a relationship with him. Which is (a) lovely,… View Post
To All The Boys I’ve Shagged Before

To All The Boys I’ve Shagged Before

It’s funny how one comment from a dumbass troll can inspire an entire blog post, but that’s sometimes how life works. Put enough shit down, and roses will grow. A few weeks ago Lucy was featured in The Metro newspaper. In response, a person calling themselves ‘Plato’s Ghost’ sent her… View Post
The Tall Guy, Part 3 – Cinema

The Tall Guy, Part 3 – Cinema

Lucy’s had one date with Simon, a tall, handsome man she found on OKCupid. A few years older than Lucy, with no kids, a stable job and excellent hair, on paper Simon seemed perfect. Via WhatsApp he was chatty, flirty and interested in her, he didn’t send any toe-curling photos,… View Post
The Tall Guy, Part 2 – Melancholy

The Tall Guy, Part 2 – Melancholy

Last time, Lucy got chatting to a lovely man from OKCupid named Simon. If you missed that, you can catch up at Part 1 – Heels. Simon seems to tick every single one of Lucy’s boxes: he’s tall, handsome, has good hair, has a job, is clever, chatty, funny, flirty,… View Post
The Tall Guy, Part 1 – Heels

The Tall Guy, Part 1 – Heels

It’s the weekend, and Lucy’s still on her mission to find someone she likes enough to be a replacement for non-monogamous Charlie. This is proving a tad tricky, because (a) most of the men she comes across on dating apps are utter bottom-feeding scum, and (b) although he’s causing her… View Post
The One Who Was Just Nice

The One Who Was Just Nice

Regular readers of this blog will know that for nearly six months now Lucy’s been dating a polyamorous man named Charlie. If you didn’t know that, you can catch up over here. Though be warned, there’s quite a lot, so you might want to grab a wee and a cuppa… View Post
Mr Non-Monogamous, Part 11 – Judgement

Mr Non-Monogamous, Part 11 – Judgement

If you’ve been following this story for a while you’ll know that Lucy’s somehow managed to end up, quite by accident, in a sort-of relationship with a polyamorous man named Charlie. If you haven’t, here are links to the very beginning and what happened last week. In many ways this… View Post
Mr Non-Monogamous, Part 10 – Parallel Universe

Mr Non-Monogamous, Part 10 – Parallel Universe

A few days after her last date with non-monogamous Charlie, Lucy goes for a drink with her mate Phil. If you haven’t caught up on the Charlie story yet, start from the beginning here or click here to read what happened last time. As a chronic oversharer Lucy normally likes… View Post
Names and some minor details have been changed to protect the innocent. And sometimes the guilty.